The birth story of Richie Jack...

Warning... this post contains birth photos & me in the nuddie! Do not proceed if you wish to avoid seeing my woman bits!

So here we are! Richie is living his ninth day on the outside and is doing wonderfully. 

Richie's birth story starts way back at my blessingway on February 4th. After everyone went home I had about 25 hours of prelabour before it tapered off and stopped. This put my brain into the labour zone and I started to feel like it might happen soon. At this point I was 38 weeks pregnant and totally ready for it to happen. 

Each day I anticipated labour starting. I had several other prelabour sessions as I passed 39, 40, 41, 42 weeks. Each day I felt different. Some days I was happy to keep waiting and just went on with life as normal. Other days I got so down and sad and felt that my body had betrayed me. As you know I had been planning to give birth in our home and I really wanted to avoid induction- particularly the syntocinon drip which causes the nature of labour to change dramatically and moves a woman far away from the physiological hormonal process that usually happens in natural birth. 

I decided to have monitoring in the hospital after 42 weeks to ensure that our baby was ok and that the placenta was still functioning properly. My plan was to wait until labour started spontaneously unless the monitoring indicated that the baby really needed to be born. I had five days of monitoring and on the 5th day, there was a significant enough change to cause me to make the decision to change to "plan B" and have an artificial rupture of membranes (AROM) in the hospital on Sunday the 13th of March. 

Once I had made that decision I had this overwhelming sense of peace. Like the weight of the world had been lifted off my shoulders. Molly went to stay with her cousin Felix for the night and John and I had a lovely relaxed night together watching crappy American sit-coms (Everybody Loves Raymond, Seinfeld and the american version of The Office were our favourites over last weeks of my pregnancy) and I slept so deeply and peacefully. It was the best I had slept in months so I woke feeling refreshed and ready for what the day would bring. We were asked to get to the hospital at 6:45am to be admitted and get settled into our birthing space. My mum and midwife arrived at about 8am and we sat and chatted and eagerly anticipated the coming events!

Waiting to be seen by the doctor. About 7am. Excited!

At 10am a doctor came to see me and he checked my cervix. He said it was 3cms and could be stretched to 4 so I wouldn't need any prostaglandin gel to ripen my cervix before breaking my waters. I was really happy about this as the gel can cause more discomfort. He then broke my waters. There was only a small amount at first so we weren't sure if he had done it properly but when I stood up I had a big gush and soaked several pads before it lightened to a trickle. The liquor was perfectly clear (which is sort of strange for such a "post-dates" baby).

We decided to get out of the hospital for a while and went for a walk in a really lovely park nearby. It was a beautiful day. A clear blue sky and a lovely breeze. Perfect for walking in the park. It was a very strange feeling. So normal. Walking in the park with John, mum and Joy and chatting about whatever came up. Kind of ignoring the fact that I was trying to get myself into labour. It was a stark contrast to the dark stairwell walk we did after I had an AROM with Molly. After this we decided to grab a drink and something to eat from the cafe before returning to the room to concentrate on getting things moving. 

Once back in the room I started having some irregular contractions. They were only light and I could easily talk through them. Mum, John and Joy sat around doing crosswords and playing scrabble on the iphone and I went into the bathroom, turned off the bright light and listened to my birth hypnosis CD. I would come out and give thumbs up when I was having a tightening and John wrote down the time. I didn't care about how far apart they were. I was busy trying to get out of my head and into labour land. As the time approached for the doctors to return and check my progress I started having what I would describe as proper labour-like contractions. They were further apart and much more intense. Like a rubber band being pulled from hip-bone to hip-bone and crampy. I had about 4 or 5 of these before the doctor returned. 

When he came back I was mid contraction and I had to wait for it to finish before being able to let him examine me again. It was two o'clock by this stage and he said I had made very little progress between the last VE and this one. He said the head was much lower but I was still only about 4 cms. At this point he strongly recommended I consent to the syntocinon but after asking for some privacy to talk it over with my team, I decided to wait another two hours to see if what I was feeling was actually true labor contractions. I'm so glad I did! This was it!

Things intensified very quickly after this point. Before this point I was mostly in the bathroom but ventured out to have a chat every now and then. Once the contractions started picking up I decided that the bathroom was the perfect place to be. It was not the vision I had for my birth but it felt safe and I stood in front of the toilet hanging on to the grab-rail and lowering myself up and down onto the toilet. I felt this motion really helped bring the head down and although it hurt more when I sat down it felt really good to feel the opening/stretching sensations that told me my baby was coming. I was taking my pants off and putting them back on when I sat on the toilet and at some stage I decided it would be better to leave them off. 

I started needing to vocalise through the sensations and found my "labour song". I moaned with a low "OOOOHhhhhmmmmmm" sound and tried to focus on relaxing my bottom and let gravity draw my body down with each wave. I still had decent breaks in between sensations at this point.

Right on two hours after the last VE the doctor returned (funny, he had been late all day but now that I was refusing syntocinon he was very keen to examine me again). From my perspective it was pretty clear that I was in labour. I was vocalising, I was hiding in my bathroom cave, I had my pants off and didn't care who saw me but still... I had entered into the medical model and they need hard evidence to prove that a baby is coming. I said if the doctor was going to examine me he was going to need to do it in the bathroom. He seemed very uncomfortable with this and said that it would be a bit awkward (for him yes!!). My midwife said something along the lines of "I once had a vet as a client who said she never made a cow lie down on a bed for an examination"... We all laughed.. I said something like "I hope he doesn't need to put his arm that far up me".. the doctor didn't get the joke.. I was grateful to Joy for lightening the mood and for making the doctor look a bit stupid. After this I actually felt a little better and decided to get the exam over with so I quickly jumped up on the bed and I was examined again. This time the doctor was very rough. He poked and prodded and I told him to stop. He didn't stop, saying he just wanted to check one more thing"...I said "get out". Someone said "she has withdrawn her consent" (meaning, what you are doing is no longer legal) and he quickly stopped. He told me I was 7cms and the baby was in a right occiput anterior position (ROA). I was very glad to see the back of him (I think we all were). I'm pretty sure he was annoyed that I had been right about what I was feeling.

I told Joy that I didn't think that baby was ROA. I thought LOA and the doppler position when we checked the heart rate was consistent with my feeling. 

I hurried back to the bathroom and resumed my position in front of the loo. I said to Joy "no synt for me" and burst into tears. My vocalisations were picking up intensity and I took off my birthing beads. They were just annoying me by this stage. My moans started to get really shaky at the peak of each wave and tapered off. I had a heavy crampy feeling between each contraction and wasn't finding much relief although I would definitely say there was no time when I had back-to-back contractions that I couldn't cope with. The sensations were extremely intense. I started saying "owww" and "this hurts". When I said these things I found it much harder to relax my bottom and it made it hurt more. I remembered Ina May's advice to relax your mouth and relax your bottom. I adopted a new chant.. "Relaaaaaax relaaaaaaax relaaaaaaax" and "yessss yesss yesss" while squatting down and relaxing downward. I even started saying "thank you Lord" at the peak of contractions.  Once I relaxed I could cope very well with the intense surges and I could breathe my baby down. Joy applied counter pressure to my sacrum which helped a lot. I could feel a great heaviness in my vagina and I asked for a wet face washer to hold against it. There was bright red blood on the face washer and I knew my cervix was nearly there. 

All of a sudden I had this burst of energy. I was no longer in a meditative state. I was fully alert and said "okay, let's go out now". I left my cave, took off the rest of my clothes and took up an all fours position on a mat next to the bed. I leaned on the bed for a while and felt the nature of my sensations change from the stretchy opening cramps to an expulsive pushing urge. I never got to feel this with Molly as I was totally numb from the waist down. It was an amazing feeling. My body just took over and my vocalisations became higher pitched and grunty. Kind of like crying with a grunt at the end. Then the crying stopped and then there was just the grunting. 

Feeling the first of the pushing urges

There's the facewasher next to my knee... Ignore the dirty feet.

My mum was sitting in front of me and looked like she didn't know what to do with herself so I asked her to come around the "back-end" with the others. The head came into view very quickly and I moved from all fours to having one leg up, then swapped legs due to a cramp and then returned to all fours with my bum very close to the mat. Mum said that watching the midwives was like watching two mechanics working with their torches underneath a car. 

Bringing baby down

I touched the head and was totally awestruck. I felt long hair that I stroked. I felt my perineum stretching and massaged it with my hand. I pushed with each contraction and felt the head come further and further down. It slipped back once but I quickly figured out how much pressure I needed to maintain in order to hold it there between surges. I felt the "ring of fire" and spent one contraction resisting it but then decided I really wanted to meet my baby and with an almighty push I worked the big round head out of my body. 

Melon head emerging!

I rested between contractions. As soon as I felt the next surge I pushed with everything I had and felt the body slide out of me. I stopped pushing, thinking it was all done and the midwife said "keep going, the legs aren't out" and with one more push the rest came tumbling out.

After unwrapping the cord that was wrapped around a leg and an arm (I think), Joy passed my baby through my legs to me and I held it close and enjoyed the feeling of my warm, wet, squirmy baby on my chest. I put my wiggly little person down in front of me and checked the sex.. A BOY! MY BOY! I stroked his body and face and made sure he was breathing and ok. He let out a beautiful cry and I held him to my body again before moving to the bed for skin to skin and the first breastfeed. He attached almost immediately. John spent the second stage taking photos and some video and cried when we realised we had a boy and all was well. He was/is so proud of me.

Richie Jack Carr was born on 13.3.11 at 5:11pm weighing in at 4.46kg or 9lb 13oz.

Joy and I had worked out a plan for the third stage (delivery of the placenta) that was different to hospital procedure. Because I had my waters artificially broken (therefor disturbing the natural process albeit in a small way) I had decided to have the oxytocic injection to deliver the placenta but because I wanted to let my baby receive all the blood from the cord (wait for it to stop pulsating before cutting it) Joy recommended waiting for it to stop pulsing before giving me the injection, thus ensuring that he didn't get any of the oxytocic drug via the placenta (usually the midwife would inject the mum in the thigh as the shoulders came out). There was also instruction in Joy's words, not to "fiddle with the fundus" and to let me push the placenta out when it detached itself. This process went exactly as we had planned and I have had only light bleeding since. Joy and I examined the placenta together and it was intact and the membranes only had a small hole where Richie came through. Amazing! 

I required some stitches as my episiotomy scar from Molly's birth didn't hold up very well. That was very uncomfortable! 

All in all it was an amazing birth for a hospital induction! I felt strong, empowered and knew what was going on in my body. Of course, I would have preferred to birth at home however I am so happy with how this birth went and am so grateful to my support people. I would never birth in a hospital without an independent midwife. 

Richie required some special care in hospital but is fine now and I'll elaborate more on that in the next post.

 Hope you enjoyed reading about Richie Jack's birth!

Little Buddha 

40 weeks tomorrow

This morning I visited my midwife for my 40 week check-up. After a lovely chat and making some last minute arrangements, she taught me her special nipple stimulation technique so I can try to encourage things along and not end up needing to go down the route of monitoring in the hospital after 42 weeks.

It was quite funny actually as my friend (and student midwife) Mel was there and Joy suggested she try it on her own nipples so she could feel her body respond and understand what the mother may feel (sort of- without feeling her uterus contract around a giant baby). So we were all sitting there stroking our nipples together and having a good old giggle. We were very pleased to see that my uterus responded very quickly with a nice strong contraction and I had three more before I left. All seems well. My blood pressure is 110/70 as usual. FHT= 140. Position feels good and the head is down nice and low now.

John and Molly went op-shopping while I was there (Molly bought a birthday present for the baby... very sweet) and when they picked me up we headed back across town toward home. We decided to make a quick detour via the Abbostford Convent bakery to get a delicious pie for lunch. I really didn't feel like getting out of the car so John ran in and we ate our lunch in the car before heading home. On the drive I felt all spacey and glazed and really couldn't wait to get home into my nest.

There has been the nicest feeling in the house since we got home. John and I sat down to have a cup of tea and enjoyed sharing a piece of lemon slice and a florentine cookie. I decided to try the nipple thing and it started working immediately. John left me to it while he helped Molly tidy her room.

For the rest of the afternoon I have only needed to stimulate about one in five contractions. They are starting to become more pronounced but still not painful. I just had the most wonderfully hot shower (finally, it's cool enough weather to enjoy one!) while John took Molly for a scoot down to the park and I have just really enjoyed the alone time, sitting on my bed all warm from the shower with some beautiful candles burning, feeling my body prepare itself for the work ahead. I have decided to have a break from trying to make them happen while I have dinner and see if my body decides it wants to keep them happening.

I am really excited to meet our baby. Will it be a little boy or a little girl?? We have names ready finally!

Not getting my hopes up as I have had a lot of prelabour and I know that it could all stop before the night is through. Right now I am just enjoying the stretching, pulling, crampy sensations that signal that our baby may not be far away from meeting us.

We shall see...

39 week update

Okay, so I have been a bit MIA recently.. To be honest, I can't be bothered blogging but have forced myself to come and record what's going on in week 39!

In dot points:

• 39 weeks today

• Have had 25 hours of pre-labour that ended yesterday afternoon. It was hurty and regular enough that I called midwife and support people to let them know that I thought things might be starting. It was a really nice family day going for walks and hanging out. The contractions felt like they were doing something so hopefully my active labour will be a little shorter. I have had quite a few hurty contractions since (having one now actually) but not regular. I'm thinking baby is trying to find a good position and then s/he will hit the go button.

• We set up the birth pool last week and have checked that all the hoses etc connect. Good to go!

• Washed and folded all the cloth nappies and everything has a place.

• The bed is prepared with a waterproof liner.

• I've lost a kilo in the last 2 days... worth noting but not important.

• Had my mother blessing- it was a gorgeous time with my women friends and family. I now have some beautiful prayer flags, a birth necklace made of beads contributed by the guests and an amazing henna owl belly.

• I am a bit of a hermit right now but am feeling frustrated because I'm not getting out of the house much.. I'm full of contradictions. 

That will do for now.. Back to being bored and frustrated.. lol

;P

My goodness!!

That pregnancy ticker over there says I'm going to have a baby real soon!!

Yikes!

:-D

Private vs public vs independent midwifery...

Here is an email I sent today to a friend who asked me my advice about models of prenatal care.. I thought I'd post my response here as I feel it could help others who are considering threr options.

Hi there!

I would be happy to give you advice based on my research and experience.

I chose public hospital midwifery care for Molly's birth. This meant everything was covered including all tests. The reason I chose public care was less due to cost though and more due to the MUCH lower rates of intervention and cesarean section. Midwifery care is recommended by the World Health Organisation as the gold standard of care. Obstetricians are very good at working with high risk mothers however (with the exception of a few) they treat all pregnancies as if they are high risk- that's what they are trained to do. Pregnancy is not a medical emergency and midwifery care is a much better option for a healthy mother and baby. Private hospitals have much higher cesarian rates than public hospitals. *** 

This time I am choosing to pay an independent midwife and give birth at home. I felt that being in the hospital system caused much of the drama that happened with Molly's birth. I was pregnant until 42 weeks and because of hospital policy (no clinical evidence to say either of us were not ok) I was induced and ended up with a very traumatic birth experience. No cesarean luckily but forceps and a big episiotomy and then breastfeeding dramas due to Molly being (in my opinion) unnecessarily put in the special care unit. 

So now I have a midwife (Joy) who has been working since 1973 to be with me when I give birth. She is caring and nurturing but highly experienced and I feel completely confident in her care. I have a hospital backup if I need it and Joy is trained to pick up any signs early which may indicate I need to transfer. We don't have a lot of spare money but I feel this is an expense I would go into debt for as it is so important to me to avoid the same kind of thing that happened with Molly.

Birth environment is exceptionally important when it comes to having a calm and physiological birth without the need for interventions. It is another process of elimination (like pooing! lol) and requires the same kind of safety and privacy to prevent getting "stage fright". Imagine having to do a poo in a room full of strangers with a bright light shining on your butt?? Or imagine having sex and trying to climax in this same kind of environment??!! It's the same hormones that got the baby in that will get the baby out and they can be easily disturbed. That's why there are so many more interventions in hospitals. It just doesn't always feel that safe and secure (but it CAN of course). The body knows what to do, however you can increase your chances of a really good birth by choosing your birth environment carefully. (SEE Dr. Michel Odent's work and Dr. Sarah Buckley)

There is some extremely good evidence based information here: http://www.birthready.com.au/articles/choosing-your-caregiver/ 

Hope this helps.. I am definitely biased but have done my research.

xo

Ash

** I have removed a sentence about obs making money from performing procedures as I realise I need some stats to back this up. While I am pretty confident in this statement, I am choosing to remove it as I don't have the data at this moment.

37 week belly

I am fearfully and wonderfully made...

Oh yes, you shaped me first inside, then out; you formed me in my mother's womb. I thank you, High God—you're breathtaking! Body and soul, I am marvelously made! I worship in adoration—what a creation! You know me inside and out, you know every bone in my body; You know exactly how I was made, bit by bit, how I was sculpted from nothing into something. Like an open book, you watched me grow from conception to birth; all the stages of my life were spread out before you, The days of my life all prepared before I'd even lived one day. 

Psalm 139: 13 - 16

35 week update...

Well.. Here we are at 35 weeks. 

At this point in my last pregnancy I still had another 7 weeks before I met Molly. Little did I know just how much bigger I could get and how long she would want to hang around inside me. 

Here are a few pics from my last pregnancy just for interests sake..

36 weeks pregnant with Molly

36 weeks pregnant with Molly

38 weeks pregnant with Molly (sitting with the gorgeous 9 month old Felix man)

42 weeks pregnant with Molly and having a coffee before going in to hospital to be induced.. *don't do it!!*  Man my belly was huge!! 

And now for my most recent belly pics.. I am interested in the difference between the first picture above and these ones as there is only a week difference in gestation but I have managed to keep a bit fitter and healthier this time around and I can see a big difference..

I am wearing "new" clothes from Nicky.. I am so grateful for the package that arrived today as I am down to one dress, one pair of pants and 2 singlets.. Thanks honey! And thanks for the wonderful pile of boy and unisex baby clothes.. We have so much pink as lots of friends have offloaded girls hand-me-downs. I am not a pink kind of girl so am planning to dye a lot of the pink items other colours anyway. Yay for a jumpsuit with trucks!! 

This week I have been pretty emotional and have been experiencing spurts of energy and then periods of extreme tiredness. Thankfully I am now on maternity leave and I can kind of go with the flow (to an extent) and an afternoon nap is quickly becoming routine. The pelvic pain is coming and going but I think some of it (ie. the zingy electric shock type sensations in my cervix) is to do with baby beginning to make his/her descent lower into my pelvis. 

I had a little bit of a stress last night that I wasn't going to be able to handle the extreme sensations of labour. Luckily a few of my friends were online and I was able to receive a bit of a pep talk and my friend Kate sent me a wonderful list of birth affirmations. One that really helped was; 

"The power and intensity of my contractions cannot be stronger than me, because it is me."

I need to remember that the contractions I experienced with my induced labour were incredibly and unbearably intense because my body was not producing the right amounts of hormones due to the synthetic ones being put into my body. The hormones that the body naturally produce in an unmedicated labour work also to help manage pain. My uterus was contracting to strongly and without any breaks when I was at only 5cms dilation. I was not weak in opting to have an epidural. I was getting very distressed and because of that, so was my baby. I needed a rest so I could calm down. Pain relief was the sensible option in this situation. Because I was in an extremely stressful environment with a lot of pressure to give birth to my baby before the new year, I could not relax and allow my body's own amazing hormonal cocktail to it's job. 

This is a large part of the reason I have chosen to plan a homebirth. Should I end up in the hospital (fingers crossed I don't) it will be for good reason and supported my my wonderful midwife. 

34 weeks

33 week update

So here I am at 33 weeks! 

Where did that time go?

I thought I'd better come and post something other than photos! So I thought I'd record how I am feeling physically, mentally and spiritually..

PHYSICALLY

My body is feeling big and awkward. I had to walk up a big hill today while I was supporting a client at work and I felt like I was going backwards. I must have looked awkward because my client laughed. I am having a hard time getting back to sleep if I am woken at night. The last few nights have been awful as the pain in my symphysis pubis is back again and it hurts every time I try and turn over in bed. If I find a comfy position (usually laying on my left with my long body pillow between my knees) I need to stay put for as long as possible. I resent having to get up and go to the toilet in the night. 

This all sounds very gloomy doesn't it? I actually love being pregnant. I love my big round belly and the way my body is preparing to sustain the little one's life once it is born. I love the way other mother's look at me and the conversations I have in my community because of my very obviously pregnant body. I get to hear all sorts of stories and get to share my own just about every day.

I can now pretty much always feel some part of the baby when I rub my hands over my belly. My belly is quickly filling up and I can't believe it could be another 8 weeks! I honestly hope not. 

MENTALLY

I have been vagueing out in a big way. I read an interesting blog piece HERE at birthfaith.org looking at the nesting urge (which has hit me in a big way) and the release of increased amounts of prolactin in late pregnancy. Here is a little excerpt; 

"In his book, Birth and Breastfeeding, Michel Odent connects prolactin directly to nesting behavior:

[Prolactin] does not only act on the breast; it is the basis for nest building in animals. . . . Studies of breastfeeding mothers and of the symptoms suffered by men and women with prolactin-secreting tumors have increased our knowledge of the behavioral effects of this hormone on humans. One such effect is the reduction of libido or sexual interest. In addition, prolactin tends to engender subordinate and submissive states of mind. . . . These behavioral effects are easily explained in terms of the survival of the species. . . . The mother’s subordinate state increases her adaptability to the needs of the baby. (p. 118-119)"

The highlighted part really jumped out at me as only yesterday, when discussing where to go for lunch, I found myself saying to my work colleague "I don't care where we go, I'll just get in the car and you drive me where you want to go"... And then spent most of the afternoon staring off into space and only emerging from "Ash-lala-land" when being asked a direct question. I can tell you, this is not a useful state for Social Work however it is perfect for preparing to birth a baby. 

This kind of state is also perfect for repetitive "nesting" type tasks like sorting, washing, mending etc etc.. and also easy knitting! Which, as you may have noticed, I have been doing a bit of recently. But I have no patience for delicate knits or complex patterns.. too much concentration required for this vagued out mama!

SPIRITUALLY

I am peaceful in my spirit right now. This may be an extension of what I was talking about regarding my mental state but I think it's separate. I know I have a lot to do before the babe joins us but I don't feel a great sense of urgency.. I am peaceful. I am confident that God is good and will take care of me and of our baby. The right people have come into our lives to help us (babe and I) birth safely. 

I feel there is a deep connection between God, myself and the baby and when I am speaking to the baby I end up speaking to God as well. Sometimes I speak to the baby and talk about how I will do my very best to bring it into the world safely and peacefully and end up praying that we will be helped by the spirit and that I will be a strong and wise woman. When I do my nightly relaxation, I find myself talking to God. The whole thing is so intertwined and I feel it's impossible for me to separate God from my experience of this pregnancy and birth. How could I? I get to experience creation in it's purest form. I get to see a baby take it's first breath of air and feel it's new slippery body. I get to feed a baby at my breast and assist God to nurture and grow another person. It is so very spiritual for me. 

So that's where I'm at. 

Thanks for reading...

33 week belly

My innie is becoming an outie!

32 week belly

Brighter day...

Mother & daughter (source)

My mood has shifted dramatically in the last few days. I am feeling positively chipper today! Pretty sure this shift has happened because we have had a really wonderful Christmas break followed by Molly's 4th birthday party at our place yesterday.

It has been so nice to be surrounded by family and friends who we love and who love and support us so well. My mother is on annual leave until January 10th and we have already spent more time together in the last few days than we have in a very long time. I really need that right now. To feel completely myself and comfortable with another woman who knows me so well.

I met with my midwife this morning and mum was able to attend the appointment with me. It was really nice to see how quietly excited and proud she is to be involved in this process. During the appointment we spoke about my good glucose challenge results (yay body! you rock!) and the need to continue eating really well for the remainder of the pregnancy. I expressed how glad I am that the Christmas period is over and I can get back to some kind of food routine. I don't think I am the only one who feels like this. We also discussed some practical stuff around the birth pool and what supplies to have ready for the birth and about what factors may lead to a decision to transfer to hospital for the birth. I feel really good about this and am confident that we will work really well together and make the best decisions we can at the time.

I was right about baby's position.. head down, back on my left.. anterior (at the time she palpated my belly). It's nice to know I can trust what I am feeling. I don't think I had a clue last time and just trusted the midwife's guess.  For the record, my BP is a little up from last time 130/80 but still in a normal range. Babe's heart rate is 152bpm. Belly is right where it should be for size and my midwife said the baby feels just the right size for gestation. Not too big! :)

All good to hear!!

After the appointment I enjoyed a bbq steak and salad at mum's place before heading to the shops on my own to get some groceries. This sounds like a pretty boring way to spend the afternoon however for me, some mama time followed by alone time (no matter what the activity) is just perfect. Planning to make a yummy pumpkin, lentil and zucchini soup for dinner. But before that, I think I'll take a nap! What a nice day!

I hope your post-Christmas period is as nice as mine is turning out to be!

xo

31 weeks

I am SO over working!

It's boxing day and I am sitting here in the office feeling very "blah" and wondering how on earth I am going to get through the next 9 (or so) weeks until this baby is born. I predict feeling a little more peaceful once I am on leave (my last day is January 15th- bring it on!). I already feel as big as a house and am having a little trouble today in finding the inner "goddess". I know she's there somewhere, I see her in just about every other pregnant woman. I just feel so damned disabled, sore and awkward! I am sure I felt like this last time but have probably blocked it out.

I have been getting a lot of braxton hicks contractions (John likes to call them Toni Braxton hicks). I don't think I had this many last time. I am getting them all day. The baby moving, getting in and out of the car, going over speed bumps, turning over in bed.... all these things cause them to happen and they are quite uncomfortable at times. I hear of women who don't even notice them happening but these cannot be ignored. They only last 10 -15 seconds and aren't painful. They just take my breath away. I am trying to view them as getting my body ready to come into labour spontaneously at the right time. Hopefully the "right time" is not past 42 weeks as I am so uncomfortable already and the thought of another 10-12 weeks is just completely depressing to think about. Having said that, this little one will come when he/she is ready and I will not be rushing the process due to my own discomfort.. just let me have a whinge. I think cutting caffeine and increasing water should help calm these BH contractions. 

I am seeing my midwife on Tuesday and I am interested to see what position she thinks the baby is in. I get most of my bigger kicks in the upper right area of my abdomen but sometimes around the front so I think that s/he is head down and flipping from a posterior to an anterior position with it's back mostly on the left. From my own poking and prodding, the head is still totally mobile above my pubic bone and occasionally moves near my right hip bone.  

My nutrition has been a bit all over the place with lots of Christmas treats! Although yesterday I didn't actually go overboard at lunch and dinner as I am quickly running out of stomach space and I fill up quickly. Lunch was a yummy mix of roast turkey, ham and mum's regular spread of delicious salads and of course a fab pudding. We had dinner with John's family and I pretty much had a plate of roast parsnip, carrot, sweet potato and green beans. I could not manage any more meat but did have another small serving of pudding afterwards. As the night wore on I just couldn't get comfortable in any position. There was seriously not one chair in the house that I could sit on. It was a lovely but very busy day with a lot of driving and talking and pressies and food. I think my body was just craving home. Once I lay down in my comfy bed I was out like a light and didn't wake till 7:30.

 This week I am sticking to fruit, veggies, meat, fish, rice, oats, yoghurt and water. I am starting to drink a cup a day of red raspberry leaf tea with a little nettle and peppermint as I have been feeling flat and like I am low in iron. The RRL tea may also help with the BHs. I take a pregnancy multi and have started taking iron too.

Tomorrow is Molly's 4th birthday party and I have asked everyone to bring a plate as I seriously do not have the energy to prepare party food (I am making a cake though) and I assume most people have Christmas leftovers they can bring. We are going to the local playground and I have organised a couple of games- the actual facilitation of said games will most likely be delegated to John. I hope the weather holds out and we don't end up needing to go back to our house.

Anyway.. enough whining from me. Hope you all had a lovely Christmas or festivus or whatever you celebrate- if you celebrate... ugh! I'm tiring myself out!

Here is me at 31 weeks.. tired and bloated and needing water and good food!

Please leave me a comment! I love hearing from you!

xo

30 week bump

It might just be what I am wearing, but my bump doesn't seem as big. Maybe I'm just getting used to this thing.

I weighed myself this morning and a pretty happy to report that I am 15kg up from my starting weight. I know this sounds like a lot to some people but for someone who gained nearly 40 in her first pregnancy this is good news! Now I just need to lay off the shortbread and mince pies over Christmas and we should be able to scrape in an even 20kg gain for the whole pregnancy (how average of me!)

Just wanted to post a little shout-out to Danielle at Hello Owl. You and your family are in my prayers and in my heart. Big hugs. Please go over there and offer some support.

Sad sack...

I have been totally miserable for most of the day.

For no reason..

29 week update and a bit of a rant!

I am getting so many braxton hicks contractions at the moment. Baby Carr is so active and the movements cause these "practice" contractions and they really take my breath away. They are not painful at all but I do have to stop and concentrate on them at times. I am hoping this will get me all primed and ready to go into spontaneous labour before 42 weeks gestation.

I am happy to be patient and wait for baby to come when he/she is ready this time, however I do really hope things start before 42 weeks. If baby does wait that long I will be having regular monitoring to ensure babe & I are healthy and well and, assuming all is fine, we will be waiting for baby to arrive in his or her own time.

At around 20 weeks (when others were having anomaly scans which we chose to avoid) I was beginning to wish we knew the sex of our baby. Other's started talking about their babies using "him" or "her" and I began feeling that it would be kind of nice to be able to speak in a more familiar way about our little one. But having made the decision a long time ago (after reading many articles suggesting that ultrasounds may not be as safe for baby as is commonly thought) to avoid unnecessary scans, we were stuck not knowing whether I was growing a little boy or another little girl.

I can happily say that I am so glad we don't know. I am a believer that there are not many true surprises in life and this is something that we feel will add to the experience of birthing this baby. We didn't know with Molly either. I am getting so excited about giving birth and welcoming a new life earthside to join our family. Molly can't wait and is beginning to feel impatient about when babe will arrive.

For the record, my hunch is that it is a boy and that I will come into labour on March 5th 2011. It will probably be wrong but I thought it was worth recording in case I am right!

My feelings about the birth itself swing between a serene sense of calm anticipation to a little bit of panic and anxiety about how I am going to handle the pain. I have a good understanding of the physiology of birth and the way hormones interact to assist a mother to naturally manage the pain however I only have a medical induction to compare it to... the induction was absolutely awful and I did not cope at all. I know from hearing stories and reading lots of information that a chemically induced labour is vastly different to one in which the woman comes into labour spontaneously and goes on to feel safe and supported through her labour and birth without stimulus to bring her out of "the zone" and affect the steady release of oxytocin.

Something that eases my mind about these fears is that I have made plans to give me the best chance possible of being able to have this kind of birth. I am birthing at home as long as baby & I remain well, I have an independent midwife who I really like and respect (and more importantly, she respects me and my choices), my support people (John and Mum) are on board and agree with my choice to birth at home, I am keeping well and healthy and I am staying out of the hospital system unless there is a medical need for me to enter it.

The number one factor influencing how you birth is your choice of care provider (should you choose to have one). If you have a care provider (Ob) with a high caesarian rate or a high episiotomy rate, you are likely to be an addition to their statistics. On the flip side, if you hire a midwife who usually sits in the other room knitting or reading and allowing the mother to do the work of bringing a baby earthside in privacy, you will probably have this kind of experience yourself.

What I am saying, is DO YOUR RESEARCH! And choose the care provider who fits with your own birth philosophy. If your philosophy does not match that of your care provider, you will find yourself fighting your way through the whole experience- this is NOT what a birthing woman needs.

If you want a VBAC, find the care provider who has the most experience and the best stats in supporting women to achieve this.

You are the CEO of your body and of your birth. YOU make the decisions. Just let them be well informed decisions..

29 Weeks..

Eggs & pelvic pain...

After suffering for several weeks with fairly severe pelvic pain, a friend of mine suggested lecithin to ease the pain. I had never heard much about lecithin before so I did what all good bloggers do and I "Googled it"..

I found out that a great source of lecithin is the humble chicken egg!

So three days later, and eating 2 eggs per day, I can confidently say that my pelvic pain has eased substantially! I am quite shocked at the super swift result! I am so thankful to my friend for suggesting it... 

I have some exercises from my osteo and have been advised to get a support belt..

If this combination (eggs, exercises & belt) is all it takes to feel better, I'm stoked!